The Fake Ex-Wife Chronicles

Someone is going to be pissy...

2008-02-26T22:06:00.000-08:00

Firstly...I would like to thank you all (Brian) for your care and concern during my migraine. I know who really loves me. :p

BIG NEWS! Guess who got her hands on some pretty little blue pills! And guess who will be sending me emails trying to get his paws on some...but these are special...me no share.

I actually NEED these (much like I need that bottle of wine on Friday nites). I have been struggling with sleeping lately and when seeing my doctor today, he suggested that it was one of many things contributing to the headache. I have had my headache for 8 days! Yes, 8 days. In addition to sleeping pills, he prescribed massage therapy, heat and rest. Apparently my neck and shoulders are like rocks and causing the headache. I have neck and jaw pain too. I'm a mess! I am taking at least 1/2 a day off tomorrow because I don't know how I will react to these sleeping pills. But I will keep you posted on how they are. Maybe that's my place in the blog world. I will review pills...give you my opion...let you know if you should chase it with wine or gin... could be fun! And I could document it on video...now that could be entertaining!

I promise to get to your suggestions/questions tomorrow...but i'm about to take a pretty little blue pill and hopefully get some sleep!

PS...Yeah! My first female reader! :) Welcome chickymama!

God Help Me

2008-02-25T22:37:00.001-08:00

Will be back soon... suffering a migraine for the last 2 days... pray for me...

The Pity Look

2008-02-23T12:42:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I was in my local grocery store when I ran into an old co-worker who Ryan and I had seen in a restaurant when he was home last. I didn’t even get a chance to say hello before she had to ask me “who that cute guy was” at the restaurant. The look of hope on her face quickly diminished as I began to explain to her that Ryan is a old high school friend…blah…blah…blah. See, this look of hope was the “she got back up on that horse” look since in the middle of January my boyfriend of 4 years and I broke up. But there she stood, mind turning with thoughts like “poor girl, she’s almost 33, in prime child bearing years having to start over again”. That look of hope turned quickly to a look of pity…the “its such a shame” look. You all know that look… After politely shooting her the “you’re a bitch” look, I quickly went to the isle with the chocolate covered almonds and ripped open the bag right then and there to comfort myself. They work…

So I thank you all for visiting and leaving your comments and thoughts! I like the idea of the advice column but I need people asking me questions. I certainly have words of wisdom to offer! But until I start receiving these requests, I’ll continue to give you little glimpses of the day in the life of being Ronda.

My first request is from Brian who would like to know three surprising things about Ryan. This wish I will fulfill! But I also must prepare you for that fact that I’m not always going to be talking about Ryan. We’ll see if you can still love me then…

These are all true...

Numero Uno....He’s not ALL about cats. Many years ago, before Ryan owned cats, he had a dog named Cheemo. Cheemo was very friendly and disappeared one day, probably picked up by a stranger. My guess would be a guy nicknamed "Moose".

Numero Do-o....Ryan once considered being a silent partner with Ronda in a porn site! Mucho $$$! It all fell apart when the illegal immigrants escaped from Ronda's apartment.

Numero Three-o...Boxers.

Welcome lovers...

2008-02-22T13:39:00.000-08:00

After being snubbed from a guest spot on 14giants.com, it was suggested that I start my own blog. After much contemplation, gin and pills I said to myself "Ronda...the people are asking for more of you...you should oblige them...and you should probably limit the number of pills you consume when drinking g&t's."

I am answering the call from the boys of 14giants.com!

When I considered this blog, I wondered what I could contribute to such a page...what do I have to offer? I am not writing a phd...I do not read books that I could recommend or critique...my readers will be far more educated than I..what do they expect from me?

Then it hit me...you want dirt.

I'm good at the dirt...

So here's your chance...fire away! Send me questions...tell me what you want to see! What direction should I take this blog? Send me an email!

I will not be censored by the owner of 14giants.com!!

I'll be looking forward to hearing from you all!